Skeptic Review

In Augst of 2017, the FBI nabbed two women suspected of robbing banks in nun habits.

Certainly, costumed bank robbers are not new. In 2009, a “clumsy and jovial” Santa Claus robbed a bank in order to “pay his elves.” According to WKRN:

NASHVILLE, Tenn. – An armed suspect dressed as Santa Claus robbed a local bank Tuesday morning and told tellers he was doing so to “pay his elves.”

At 10 a.m., police said the man, dressed in a full Santa Claus costume complete with a hat, beard and sack over his shoulder, entered the Sun Trust Bank branch located at 4809 Old Hickory Boulevard in Hermitage, just north of Lebanon Pike, and approached a teller.

According to witnesses, Santa was wearing sunglasses and the teller asked him to remove them.

The suspect refused, reached into his sack and pulled out a gun.

He demanded money and told tellers if they put dye bombs with the money he’d come back “kill everyone.”

He took the money and fled, telling employees and customers in the bank he needed the money because “Santa needed to pay his elves.”

According to witnesses, the suspect was clumsy and seemed jovial.

In 2015, Darth Vader robbed a Credit Union in North Carolina, but he wasn’t the first Darth Vader to commit such an act, and again, certainly not the first costumed robber.

In 2011 in San Diego, Gumby just wanted some smokes and a little change. He left peacefully.

Teletubbies can be dangerous too. In 2014, Yellow Teletubby Lala broke into a friend’s house and stole Chinese food out of the fridge, making a getaway after pouring the food into his man purse. (The report was confusing because Lala doesn’t typically carry a purse.) But Lala was not the first Teletubby to terrorize the public. A Canadian woman reported being held up by the purple teletubby known as Tinky Winky in 2009.

Captain America may have hit more than one Ulta Beauty Supply store in Plano, Texas just last year.

In 2007, another Captain America in Florida got crosswise with bar patrons when he became vulgar, put a burrito in his pants, and groped other customers.

And, in 2016, costumed folks clashed violently when The New York Post reported: “A man clad in a Cookie Monster costume was stabbed Saturday night in Midtown when he intervened in a fight between a man wearing a Tuskegee Airman ensemble and a man dressed as an American Indian, police sources said.”

And, as the holiday season draws near, enjoy this video of this poor drunken Santa caught on camera peeing in a parking garage: